Issue 3 and Volume 96.

FALSE ALARMS “So you deceived your husband,” said the Judge. “On the contrary, he deceived me. He said he was going out of town and he didn’t go.” How are you this evening, honey, All right but lonely. Good and lonely. No, just lonely. I’ll be right over. “Let’s pick up these two girls,” said one. But as the girls drew near, the second man said, “Gosh—no—that’s my wife and sweetheart. “Funny!” said the first man. “You took the words right out of my mouth.” “Are you going to take this lying down?” boomed the candidate. “Of course not,” said a voice from the rear of the hall, “the shorthand reporters are doing that.” Is If Ever Thus? “Oh, darling,” he murmured, “I love you so. Please say you’ll be mine. I’m not rich, like Percival Brown—neither do I have a fine car like he has; nor a well-stocked cellar,…

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