Issue 12 and Volume 97.

FALSE ALARMS Highly Imaginative Admirer: “And which of your works of fiction do you consider the best?” Author: “My last income tax return.” “How children’s tastes do change.” “Yes, indeed. When my two were small Johnny just loved soldiers, and Mary was crazy for brightly painted dolls. Now Mary is crazy about soldiers and John runs after every painted doll he sees.” The farmer took his small son to market. A prospective buyer was examining some cattle, and Johnny inquired, interestedly: “Why’s that man pinching these animals, dad?” “He’s thinking of buying them, son, and he’s making sure the’re good, sound meat,” replied his father. The following day the farmer was busy in his yard when Johnny came running towards him, yelling at the top of his voice: “Dad, come quickly! The postman’s going to buy the cook!” Thanks! A card of thanks in a Virginia newspaper : “We thank…

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