By Frank E. Vaerewyck, the Firehouse Foodie
Practical jokes are common practice in the firehouse. With a job this serious, laughs are a great thing. We have a saying in the fire service, “if we don’t pick on you, we don’t like you” and even though it may seem harsh, it’s true. The FNG (fumbling new guy) is usually the butt of a lot of the jokes, childish pranks, and cut ups, but everyone is fair game at any given time. Some fire companies even give an award for the best joke of the year at their annual holiday party or banquet. Not all of these jokes, childish pranks, and cut ups are mean or mean spirited. Though some are planned out, most are spontaneous pranks that leave everyone in stitches including the one getting pranked.
The most memorable prank I can remember at the firehouse happened when I was a rookie at Punta Gorda (FL) Fire Department Station 1. Now this prank was planned out and executed perfectly. Most fire stations have metal lockers assigned to each member, and we live out of our locker while we are on duty. These lockers have a latch that a lock can be attached to to secure our goods, and most times we are the only ones with a key. In 1992, the Big Ben alarm clock was very popular and was fashioned with two big bells on the top that rang so loud that it even woke the dead. Now the shift that worked the day before us came up with the bright idea to set one of these behemoth alarm clocks for 2 A.M. and place it in one of those aforementioned lockers.
I can tell you when Big Ben started ringing on that fateful night, everyone in the house was up, and no one was happy. But, when we found where the alarm clock was and that there was no easy access to it to shut it up, well that elevated the disdain we all had for whoever played this prank. Needless to say, the lock and alarm clock did not make it to see 2:10 A.M. As well all sat around the kitchen table, awake as if we had just come from a run, we all had a good laugh. I can remember my lieutenant laughing the loudest and vowing to get them back. Well played my friends, well played.
A practical joke is a great way to bring together a family, whether it’s your work family or your natural family. Imagine the surprise on your families’ faces when they dive into a turkey roaster with bikini lines, and that, my friends, is “Bringing the Firehouse Home.” Have fun and enjoy!
Send us your favorite practical jokes, and who knows? We might post them on our Web site. With Bikini Line Turkey, your dinner will be the talk of the TOWN!! It is sure to elicit smiles from your guests!
BIKINI LINE TURKEY
1. Cut out aluminum foil in desired shapes.
2. Arrange the turkey in the roasting pan.
3. Position the foil carefully (see photo).
3. Roast according to your own recipe and serve.
4. Watch your guests’ faces and share a laugh!
Frank Vaerewyck has had a passion for the fire service that has spanned 20 years. He has been a volunteer and career firefighter and is currently a firefighter/EMT with the Manassas (VA) Volunteer Fire Company. He has passed on his passion for the fire service through instruction and mentorship. That same passion he has for the fire service is shared with his love of food. In 2006, Vaerewyck won an Iron Chef-style competition sponsored by a radio station in Richmond, Virginia. That is where he also furthered his education by attending a Culinary Arts Program.
As the Firehouse Foodie, he has been compiling recipes to be included in a cookbook that will give others the opportunity to see their hometown heroes not just as firefighters, but as the firehouse chefs they truly are.
